In
ancient times when a young woman was about to become engaged - the
biggest step in her life - her fiancée's family would present her
with a gift of tea, then one of the most precious and expensive
things available. Her acceptance of it signaled the matchmaker to
stop proposing candidates. Today, when a young woman becomes engaged
she receives a present which is still called the "tea gift" (chali)
but is not tea. "Tea gift" has become the term for "engagement."
A
related custom of "bride's tea" is followed in several variations in
South China and among people of Chinese ancestry in Southeast Asia,
the United States, and elsewhere. On the day of the wedding the
bride offers a cup of tea to her mother-in-law. By accepting the
tea, the elder woman signifies that she accepts the bride as
daughter-in-law.
